The Queen Nazz Interview: "I’m always curious about the world. I want to go deep. I want to push the boundary and see how far we can go."
"My friends warned me when we started dating. I didn't know if BDSM was some kind of mental illness."
Queen Nazz is my girlfriend, my mistress, and my muse. She is a woman who discovered BDSM later in life, but she has come to love it. In this interview, we explore her journey into kink—the misconceptions she once held, the lessons she learned, and how BDSM unlocked new dimensions of intimacy and self-discovery.
We also delve into my creative process and the profound impact Queen Nazz has had on me. Her dominance has not only shaped my personal growth but has also given me the confidence to bare my heart and soul (and skin!)—whether in my writing, stand-up comedy, or live literature readings—as a proud male submissive.
She is the female protagonist of many of my books, including my first one Real Life Femdom: Learning to Love My Leash: Farang Collared and Controlled by a Thai Mistress, which is currently available at a deep discount as a Kindle Countdown Deal from now until February 14 and all of the books in the Mistress Nazz and Ari collection and in the Domination Diaries series. Her sexy fishnet-clad legs and her horsewhip are featured in the cover image of The Thai Mistresses, my best-selling book, a bundle of five stories about femdom set in Thailand.
Did you always know you were dominant?
In general, yes, I always knew I was dominant and bossy. I always liked to be on top in bed because being on top made me cum more easily. However, I had never engaged in BDSM before.
There were a couple of guys who liked to call me a ‘Queen’ or a ‘Goddess’ and talk dirty to me. I like to talk like a bitch to them. It was fun. One guy asked me to order him to put a chastity cage on. So I played along and told him to. Maybe you could say he was ‘dominating me to dominate him’. They didn’t live in Thailand, so we never met.
Did you have any misunderstandings about kink and BDSM before?
The people I was talking to about half a decade ago--about three years before I met you--I didn’t think they were living healthy lives. The same man who asked me to put him in chastity, he asked me to give him many demands that I thought were too extreme. He wanted to live in a cage, and he wanted to send me money, so he asked me to demand him to only eat one meal a day and send me money. I never did, and he never sent me money. He showed a picture of himself, and he was so skinny, I thought he was already starving.
He had a job and a life. He couldn’t be a full-time slave. But he wanted somebody to be very mean to him and mistreat him. I thought he must have some kind of mental illness.
It is sad that many men can’t find the right balance or, even if they know what they are looking for, can’t find the woman who can provide what they need.
Yes.
And, like I was saying, I didn’t know if BDSM was some kind of mental illness because I only talked to a couple of people online, and the ones I talked to were not like you. They seemed to be too weak or trying to do something that was too extreme. My friends warned me, too, when we began dating. They told me, ‘Be careful. He might hit you.’ Now I know I am the one who hits or whips you.
I learned that someone’s fetishes and someones kinks are another kind of sexual preference. It’s something they are born with. They can be fun to engage with and play with in the consensual way.
How did your understanding of kink evolve during our relationship?
When two people connect with each other and talk openly, it’s easy to adjust and get to know each other. BDSM requires negotiation. This is too much, this is not enough. We can change this and try this, go right and left.
I’m always curious about the world and about you, my love. I want to go deep. I want to get to know you more. I want to push the boundary and see how far we can go, but when we reach the edge, if it’s too uncomfortable for either of us, or unhealthy, we step back.
How did you become convinced that I should start writing erotica?
I’m extremely horny. I like to read erotica. Ever since I was young, I’ve like enjoying sexy scenes in books and movies. You are the writer. I read what you were writing at the time. There were many scenes that were so sexy. But I was jealous. Why were you writing about some other bitch? Why wasn’t my name in that book?
So I challenged you: Write about what we just did. You wrote that scene about me tying you to the bed and dominating you with my feet and pussy in just half an hour. You wrote it on your phone while you were high sitting outside at the cafe. And I read it. It was so good. So I knew more people needed to read it.
I feel like the HR director of a company. The HR director needs to know who is the good person to hire, who is good at doing what. So I saw you were the good erotica writer, and I made you do it.
Other non-fiction accounts of my relationship with Queen Nazz can be found in Worshipping My Goddess’s Pussy and in the Domination Diaries series. You can try Domination Diaries, Vol. I for free, as there is a free book deal running and then read Vol. II: Leashed by my Girlfriend’s Girl Friends if you like what you read.
You can read most of these books for free as a perk of joining Kindle Unlimited, a subscription program with over 4 million books, including all the erotica you could ever possibly fap to, that allows you to check out up to 20 ebooks at a time. If you sign up through my affiliate link, I earn a small commission that helps support myself and the publication of My Pen, Her Whip.
Prefer listening? Sign up for a free trial of Audible Plus (also helping to support My Pen, Her Whip with this affiliate link), and you will have access to my library of audiobooks.
In the first book, Learning to Love My Leash, I described how you took me to a small town outside of Chiang Mai and put a dog leash around my neck and led me around at the resort guesthouse and the marketplace. Did you feel any shyness about taking me along on a leash?
I was not shy. It’s not a busy place. It’s outside of the city. I wouldn’t see anyone I know. And I was wearing a mask and heavy sunglasses. I already planned what I was going to say if people asked. I felt like I was testing people’s reactions. Seeing how people would react. I noticed lots of people were looking, but they had the innocent eyes. I still felt confident because I had the dominant response ready. So when I saw the vendor lady at the market stall look as if she was wondering, I responded, ‘The dog was being bad. I take the dog out to punish him.’ The Thai vendor or local people, when they hear that, they just said, ‘Oh,’ and they nod and laugh.
Thai people are chill like that. They are not like farang [foreigners]. When farang look when I take you out in Chiang Mai a couple of times, they look and stare like they think it is weird or abnormal. But we are just doing our thing and not hurting anyone.
Do you ever feel jealous about Yuna (from Worship Yuna), Kyoka (from The Film Student), Maria (from Maria and the Mad Dog), or any of the other dominant women I feature in my fictional stories?
I know they are fictional and you would never meet them in real life. Unless I make them come to life!
How much do you like roleplay? Do you feel different in different characters?
It’s fun when I’m in the mood. I don’t need any kind of script. I just feel the mood and become a character, whether I’m feeling mean, so I become the mean Thai teacher, or whether I feel cute and playful, and I want to be Mimi, the cute English-learning student. Roleplay is just like creating our own eroticas. And I can tell when I read the erotica you wrote where you incorporated the story from the roleplay we did. Or sometimes we will roleplay the fictional story you wrote. So then I can be Yuna or Kyoka.
Some dominant women like to keep their boys in chastity cages. You, on the other hand, like to make me cum all the time. You love to see my ‘white wine’ squirt high and far. Why do you like making me cum so much?
I love you. I make you cum to make you happy. When you’re happy, I’m happy.
But I imagine that if I didn’t know a man, and if he paid me to dominate me, then I could be even more mean and cruel. I wouldn’t want him to cum. I could whip him until he bled. I could get my boots dirty and rub them over their face. I couldn’t do that to you. I love you too much.
What is your favorite fetish to engage in?
Facesitting, of course. Because it makes me cum.
My second favorite is to put sexy heels on and step on you. Because I like to look sexy and see you underneath me.
In general, I like to look sexy and do anything. I like to wear leggings, high heels, boots.
Previous Interviews
The Jessica Ackles Interview: "I do a lot of my erotica writing while shackled."
Jessica Ackles writes some of the steamiest eroticas about BDSM and bondage that I have read. Her stories draw on her experiences. They include a lot of men and women in shackles and cuffs. Metal cuffs are her favorites. She also enjoys putting herself into self bondage and posts
The Kate Granger Interview: "Writing erotica has been an enormous benefit for me."
Kate Granger is a prolific author of over 1,000 stories, which together include over 4 million words. She writes on almost every sexy topic you can think of, including BDSM, slow burn romance, femdom, thrillers, swinging, LGBTQ, threesomes, and ultra taboo sex acts, and she publishes her stories
The Melanie Russell Interview: "There's also something so beautiful about a man (or anyone really) giving themselves entirely to their partner."
Melanie Russell is one of my favorite erotica writers. Her stories are fast-paced. Her characters are relatable. The scenarios she creates are scintillating.
eyemblacksheep: Interview with a Male AV Filming Slave and Producer
I have conducted interviews with erotica writers and fellow Substackers here. This is something new and exciting. It’s my first interview with a producers of erotic videos, otherwise known as pornography.